Saturday, August 28, 2010

If it's not one thing, it's another.

So now I'll be needing to get a new computer. My laptop is pretty much done for. I'm not sure entirely what is wrong with it, all I know is that my brother Alan has said that it will probably be cheaper in the long run just to get a new computer.

I'm trying to accept $800 of one of the student loans I've been offered to essentially reimburse myself for the books I bought and get a netbook. I might decide to drop it down to $500 and just consider the books as done, it's been taken care of. But we will see whenever I get to that. I'm going to investigate it further after class on Tuesday (Monday is my long day of classes).

Other than that, I got one book in the mail today, I'm hoping I'll get the next one tomorrow, then I'll be waiting on two books. Hopefully they'll all be here soon so I won't be panicking about books anymore!

Now it's time to crack open my Oceanography textbook and get to studying between bedchecks at work!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Mistakes and Learning From Them...Then Moving Forward

If I hear the words "Well, you shouldn't have gone to Louisiana" one more time, I'm probably going to scream until my throat is hoarse.

So I found out that I only got enough financial aid to cover my tuition, which is apparently a big deal considering I'm a grad student. I'm lucky to have even gotten that much aid. But I didn't know that was all I got in relation to my tuition, so I was still expecting to get a check like I had in my undergrad, with a left over balance on it. Instead, I waited in line for 2 1/2 hours to find out that not only can the lady at the Financial Aid office not pronounce the word "mineralogy," but I also owed $80.50 in left over tuition and course fees. Add on top of that, that I now had to buy my textbooks with my own money.

Had I not gone to Louisiana, this wouldn't have been an issue. And while I started this entry with not wanting to hear that phrase from another person, it's okay for me to state it. When you KNOW you've made a mistake, you don't need people CONSTANTLY reminding you that you did. I already feel like an idiot, and you constantly trying to drill it into my head when it's ALREADY THERE doesn't do anyone ANY good...does it? It just enters a territory of feeling a need to pat yourself on the back with subtle "I told you so"'s. And I'm done with hearing them.

...If I knew that I was going to need to buy my own text books, I wouldn't have gone to Louisiana. Or if I felt a DIRE need to go, I would have found the potentially most ghetto hotel in Houma and stayed there, instead of enjoying the comfort of the cost of an $85 dollar room.

What's done is done. I can't rewind time. All I can do is learn from my mistake and move on. I bought my books this morning on, but now I have to play the waiting game until they arrive. Luckily, I know a few people in the department already (Jennifer and Ashley), and I made a friend in my Mineralogy course, who will let me borrow her text while we're in class to check my progress of my lab notes (which I did this morning).'s cost for 4 books: $305 (and some change)
Sequoia Text Books (Across the street from CSUF): $400-ish
CSUF's book store (Kennel Bookstore): $493

I definitely went the cheapest route!

Now to wait for the books!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Softball + Other Things

I got back into playing softball again a few months ago. I hadn't seriously played since I was in the 8th grade, and I missed it terribly. We play our games on Sunday nights in Clovis (send me an email/message if you want to know where)! We won tonight's game! I typically catch most of the game. I'm not a bad catcher, which is awesome for me... Because I'm still trying to retrain my arm to throw properly. It's been too many years of not playing and too many injuries!

I've fallen in love with my Water Aerobics class at my gym, too. So that keeps me moving, too!

I start classes back up tomorrow at CSU-Fresno. I'm a little stressed because I haven't gotten my financial aid check yet. I'll be stopping by the financial aid offices to find out what's going on in between classes tomorrow. Hopefully they'll have some good news for me, so I can buy my text books soon and possibly a netbook because my laptop is kind of on its last legs!

Anyhow, I haven't slept in over 24 hours at this time, so it's time for me to get my shower and go climb into bed!! Goodnight!

Couch to 5k Program!

I once did the Couch to 5k Program last year in February-April. I broke my ankle in August last year and had a lot of issues being able to run again. The last few months I've been working on just being able to run at all without relying solely on my right leg to follow through with the movements. I'm doing better, but I find that sometimes I still rely on my right leg. I decided to start the Couch to 5k program again, and continue to supplement my running with water aerobics 3 nights a week and softball 2 nights a week. I'll continue to add more and more exercise as my body can handle it.

...Now to just get the eating right portion on track!

Saturday, August 21, 2010


I've been dreading making this post for multiple reasons. First I want to explain that the main reason that I decided to go to Louisiana and on such short notice, was to visit my friend Eric. I've known Eric for a few years online now, and we met through an internet gaming forum. He was always a nice guy and had no problems with being able to make me laugh. I expressed that I had a bit of a crush on him, to which he later replied that he found himself interested in me, too. So the idea of going to Louisiana for a few days popped into my head. And I started doing research to see if it were at all feasible to go before classes started on August 23rd. I found that with some proper planning and skimping on my expenses, I could go. I thought surely, if things didn't work out with Eric in that light in the long run anyway, at least I could say I'd seen a Southern state.

A couple of weeks after I'd decided to go, he expressed a concern of potentially feeling pressured into something he may not be ready for. I backed off, I mean, way off. That wasn't my intention, I didn't want to make him or anyone feel pressured into anything...EVER. My main thought was "this is a friend of mine, he makes me laugh, we're both curious about where things may naturally go, but I'm not going with the sole intent of coming back home with a boyfriend." We were friends, nothing more. Simple as that.

So I got there on Saturday night at 9 PM or so, landing at the New Orleans airport, which is really more in Kenner. I met a nice friendly couple on the plane, Darlene and Eric (obviously not the same Eric), who offered to help me find my rental car place (Dollar). They also offered to let me follow them to my hotel in Houma, because they were headed to Bourg, which are only 8.5 miles apart. I got to my hotel at about 11:30 PM, checked in, and headed to my hotel room where I crashed out pretty hard. I didn't get any sleep the day before because I was so excited to go, and then I worked for 10 1/2 hours before my flight.

I woke up the next day, enjoyed my free continental breakfast (which I abused the whole time I was there, that I could!), and then waited for Eric to come pick me up to head to the movie we were planning on seeing, Inception. After the movie we went to the mall, then he took me back to my hotel so I could grab the DVDs I brought for him to watch, and he took me to his house in Lockport. The drive over there was pretty uneventful. A lot of awkward chatter. I was a little bummed that he wasn't pointing things out to me like, "This is where I went to high school." The only thing he pointed out was the Walmart where he works. We hung out at his house for a few hours and watched the DVDs, then he took me back to my hotel. I can't even remember the time I got back to my hotel, but I can assure you it was before 9 PM.

The next morning (Monday) we made plans to hang out again, but because I had already been over there with him driving, I offered to drive myself over so he wouldn't have to spend so much gas. We hung out again for about 6-7 hours, playing video games and watching DVDs...again.

On Tuesday morning, I decided that I was going to head to the Global Wildlife Center in Folsom and the Arts and Science Museum in Baton Rouge. I enjoyed my road trip because I got to see quite a lot of the state that I probably wouldn't have seen otherwise. I got to experience driving in the worst rain I've ever experienced in my life.

The bridge going over the Mississippi.

I took the I-10 West exit, but I went to Folsom first. You have to head to Baton Rouge to get to Folsom, unless you go on the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway.

Lake Pontchartrain

The road conditions for about 95% of the drive to Folsom and Baton Rouge and back to Houma.

Heading to Folsom.

Why hello there, wildlife!

I got to feed this kangaroo, Skippy! Don't worry, the snacks that I fed him (the bag) were given to me by one of the people that worked at the Global Wildlife Center, and she said he just loooooved junkfood!

Since not many people showed up for the tour (counting me, 4 people), we got to take this jeep-like vehicle out to see the animals instead of the more bus-like thing (tractor towing larger trailers). It meant we got to be a little more up close and personal with the animals!

The feed!

Any time we stopped, these guys were RIGHT there begging for food!

I got to pet this one!

This little duck kept cracking me up. He would waddle so fast to keep up to the jeep, it was super cute!

My new best llama friend.

I got to pet a kangaroo, zebra, and giraffe!

I didn't get many other pictures from the trip, most were from the Global Wildlife Center... But if you want to see more, I have them uploaded to my Facebook (you will have to be my friend over there to be able to view them).

After the Global Wildlife Center, I headed to Baton Rouge, but by then I was already frustrated at the constant rain, and I was tired already from driving for 2 1/2+ hours. I ended up just seeing the art exhibits, the Ancient Egyptian exhibit, then I headed back to Lockport to see Eric for a few more hours, one last time, before heading to the airport the next morning and heading home.

When I left Eric's house for the last time, I was heavily disappointed. I expected some words of kindness, like "Thanks for coming to visit me," or "I hope you have a safe trip home," or "Text me to keep me posted on your trip home," or anything along those lines. I got nothing. I got "Bye!" Do you say "Bye!" to someone who just spent $1300+ to come see you for 3 days? I don't think so. It was kind of like getting kicked in the chest. I spent all of this money to go visit you, and you can't even show me around your hometown, and you can't even thank me for spending that money to come see you? I was so disappointed at that point, and within 3 miles of leaving his house I had to talk to someone, because I felt like I was breaking into pieces. I called Barbara, my best friend, and whined, and cried, and made her heart shatter into a bunch of pieces, too (what can I say, I just have that effect on people after I feel like I've been emotionally taken advantage of). I expressed to her, that while I know that Eric didn't want anything to do with me in any sort of a romantic light, I couldn't help myself to feel that way toward him. It took me a lot of thinking to figure out why it was that I felt so strongly about him...and I'll get to that in a minute. But I whined, and I cried, and I felt sorry for myself. I went to Chili's and had a margarita, for crying out loud, and I don't drink! ...I also had a chocolate cake and a cheeseburger, but that's beside the point (lol). I felt as if I had hit emotional rock bottom, and how cold he was when I was leaving his house for the last time really pissed me off. Who did he think he was? I have friends that I could have visited that would have shown me a much better time, and would have thanked me over and over again for coming to visit them. I have friends that I wouldn't have even needed to get a hotel room, had I decided to go visit them. And friends that would have picked me up at the airport instead of giving a totally lame excuse of "getting lost" in New Orleans. For one thing, the airport isn't even in New Orleans. Second, if you can take a California girl that has never been to Louisiana, and tell her to get around on her own without the help of anyone beyond Google Maps...I think YOU can make it to the airport without issues. Third...Gah, I'm done listing things because it just makes me more frustrated. My main point here is that I could find the airport without issues, all by myself, while sleep deprived and trying as hard as I could to choke back tears of anger, on Wednesday morning. You've lived in Louisiana your entire life and you can't find the airport? Riiiiight...

There are so many other things that frustrated me, but for the sake of trying not to write the longest blog post in my blogging history, I will skip ahead to what it was that seemed to make me feel so head over heels with him.

I will leave it with one brief word, and then as good of an explanation as I can muster.
Not everyone that will read this even got to meet Daniel. Daniel was without a doubt, the only man I've ever loved. He was sweet, he was goofy, he was fragile physically and emotionally, he wore his heart on his sleeve and frequently pretended to be stronger than he really was. He was awkward, and had never had a girlfriend before, and had never been in love before. Daniel had all of these traits about him, that most girls would have turned tail and ran. I stayed around. I got to know him, and I fell ridiculously in love with him.

...Eric has a lot of the same traits that Daniel had. And while I know that Eric was not at all the right guy for me in the long run, I think my problem was that I saw so many things that were similar between them...and that made me almost cling to Eric.

I can't have Daniel anymore, as many of you may know, because he took his own life a year after he broke up with me.

I can't explain it beyond that. I really can't.

All I can say is that I'm trying to mend the friendship that I had with Eric before my crush on him got so out of hand. But I'm a bit frustrated at some of the comments he's been making on his Facebook page, stating things like "Honesty may hurt but it's better than lying." ...I don't know where he is getting it in his head that I'd rather be lied to. And yeah, I'm hurt...but I'm not even hurt about him rejecting me in that light...I'm hurt about the bullcrap way he treated me when I was right in front of him. I've had perfect strangers treat me with more kindness than he did- even his mom was kinder to me than he was...And the people I met on the plane, Darlene and Eric? They were TEN times kinder to me than he was.

...All I can say is that I learned my lesson in more ways than one.
#1. Don't spend $1300 to visit someone you aren't sure about. I still had a great time in Louisiana, and I did have a lot of fun hanging out with him, too... But I came back from that trip with a real sour feeling.
#2. If I do end up meeting another guy online that claims to be interested in me at all in any light, whatsoever, he has to come to me. I'm not going to them anymore.
#3. I wasted money, that could have been sitting in my savings account to go toward my new car... But we all learn from our mistakes.

I guess the main reason I didn't want to make this entry was because I was already hearing the "I told you so"s that some people might be thinking already... And all I have to say, is that if you feel that way, please don't tell me. I already feel like an idiot, please don't make it worse.

I'm glad that I planned the trip when I did though. On the 23rd, I return to classes. I can throw myself into my studies and forget that this even happened.

Oh, and by the way, I'll say it...
Well, at least I've been to a Southern state!

Friday, August 20, 2010


I never thought I'd be so happy to make it home to dry heat and sunshine unobstructed by clouds.

Louisiana was beautiful, and I had a lot of fun, but it's so great to be home! I got home from my flight back, unpacked, started a load of laundry, and then fell asleep for about 15 hours. Eric is a really cool guy, and I had a great time hanging out with him! I will be posting pictures of my trip soon, so stay tuned!

I'm concerned that I won't reach my 210 minutes of exercise goal this week, but I'm allowing myself to fall short if I have to due to the traveling and jet lag. I'm at 140 minutes, and every week before this week I've done really well, and next week starts a whole new ball game (so to speak) with planning exercise into my school and work schedule. I'm trying to plan everything out a week in advance so I know when I'm spending my time and that I'm using it wisely!

I start classes on the 23rd! I'm really excited to get this ball rolling again!!

Saturday, August 14, 2010

You're 15? I feel old!

My super cool nephew Christian's birthday is today! He's turning 15!! I always remember his age because I was 13 when he was born, so I just subtract 13 from my age every year to remember his age (simple enough, right?)! I feel really old right now though, that I have a 15 year old nephew already!!

Happy birthday to one of the coolest teenagers I know! Now let's hit the gym when I get back from Louisiana before we both start back up at school! LOL!!

The picture above is from my brother Alan and sister-in-law Nithsavath's wedding back in December!

Friday, August 13, 2010

Checked In

As of 1:10 PM today, I have checked in for my flight tomorrow to Louisiana. As of this moment, there is less than 14 hours until my flight! I've gotten zero sleep because of a combination of excitement for my trip and a headache (yay for postherpetic neuralgia! ...err, I mean boo!). I'm probably going to snooze on the plane to Salt Lake City, and maybe again to New Orleans. By the time I land in New Orleans at 9:27 PM, collect my baggage, and then get my rental car, I will be so happy to get to my hotel in Houma to pass out officially for about 8-10 hours! I'm going to sleep SO HARD tomorrow night!

I'm SO ready to be there already!! I just have to stuff my last minute toiletries (stuff I'll use before leaving home) in my suitcase, and I'll be all set to go!!

I just wish this work shift would go by faster! It's been about an hour and a half! Meep!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

A Different Way to Go

After almost two years of working in Lemoore, and living in Clovis for most of it (all but 3 months or so)...I get a bit tired of driving the same route all of the time. Usually I hit 168-West to 180-West to 41-South all the way to work. Once in a while though, I'll change it up, and I'll drive directly south from our house in Clovis to 180-West instead, and then take 41-South the rest of the way to Lemoore.

Today, I drove that route, which puts me driving through the general vicinity of the Fresno airport. This put me into a great mood for tonight's work shift, since I leave in less than 2 days for Louisiana!

As for other routes to work, I've even been known to leave an extra 20 minutes early so I can take...You ready for this? 168-West to 180-West to 41-South to 99-South to 43-South to 198-West... Just to change the scenery up once in a while. :)

Steve* to John to Kim and Susan to...The Bitter Old Hag

So as you may or may not know, dear readers, I've had accounts on and off on various dating sites. I've tried eHarmony,, Plenty of Fish, and OkCupid. I've not had any stupendous luck when it comes to dating as a concept at all, but adding in the concept of online dating, and well... The luck is quite dumb and unfortunate, mostly, to say the least.

The main positive I can say about "online dating" is that I have in fact made a lot of interesting friends this way. For example, my friend John who I mentioned in the title. John is a pretty cool guy who ironically is friends with my friends Kim and Susan. We discovered all of our friends in common via So anyhow, I met John on OkCupid earlier this summer, while we were both just looking for friends and nothing more. On my half, I've just become utterly tired of relationships at all and have determined I'll probably die a bitter old hag (cue your tiny violins here!), and for John he had just started going through a nasty divorce. Situations are still the same there. Anyhow, I needed to set you up for how I know John in order to progress in this story.

I found out that John works at Pelco. Then I found out that he knew a guy I'd previously met on OkCupid, Steve. I met Steve last summer, and after talking on the phone for several hours and having one date with him, it was pretty obvious to everyone who knew of my dating endeavors that I was a little bit smitten for him. So when I received a message from him about a week after our date, I was excited until I began to read it. Steve had admitted that he liked me as well, but that he had just gotten out of a relationship and his then exgirlfriend had contacted him and begged him for a second chance. I told him that I knew he had to do what he had to do, because if he didn't, later he might be kicking himself for not trying to make things work. In truth, at the time I hoped they would break up so I could have him to myself..that's mostly the bitter old hag inside of me speaking, never you mind her! So anyway, John knows Steve. I expressed to John how bummed out I was that Steve went back to his exgirlfriend, but that I had finally gotten over it...I mean, I did date Jared as a rebound from Steve for 3 months, right?

John informed me about 4 hours ago now, that Steve and his girlfriend are now engaged.

This of course, enrages the bitter old hag in me, because yet another person has found happiness with regards to that aspect of life, while I just stew here in my potential hatred for the human race... Yes, I am being a tad dramatic, but only because it's more funny that way...isn't it? ...Gosh I hope so, lol.

*Do not confuse the Steve mentioned in this entry with my exboyfriend Steve who I dated for 6 months out of boredom and the deep desire to just BELONG to someone, even if he was a total putz.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Odd cravings

After an hour of water aerobics, I come home to get ready for work tonight... And I start to think "okay, what am I going to eat for dinner?"


I am so craving chicken fingers and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich!

So very very random of me! lol!

But I did surpass my 210 minute quota for the week, I'm at 270 for the week! I'm trying to figure it out mentally for next week since I will be in Louisiana for part of the week... How will I be able to get 210+ minutes without killing myself? I figure if I do at least 30 minutes of exercise while I'm in Louisiana (3 days), then I can do water aerobics twice (Wednesday and Thursday night), and I'll be covered for next week!

You know you've made a lifestyle change when you start scheduling exercise time several days in advance!

3 Days!

I took this with the map that's above my bed, in which each state is represented by one of it's license plates through time. I took this picture to make it my album cover for my trip on Facebook.

I'm really excited! I'm almost done packing, really all I have left is my toiletries and to determine if I want to take workout clothes because the hotel has a fitness room. I probably will take it, and if I don't work out, oh well...but to go and not take the clothes and feel like I want to work out, but can't? That would be an epic bummer! But my plan is to make sure I get some exercise at least 2 days that I'm there, because I can make up the rest of my workout time when I get back home!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

A Small Definition*

I stretched out my arms to either side of me, and I realized something. After only 5 classes of water aerobics and 3 weeks of attempting to get 210+ minutes of exercise a week, I already have more muscle definition in my arms. This is a great thing, and it keeps me motivated to keep up with the fitness part of my life.

The eating perfectly can come later, and I'm still making positive strides in the right direction as far as that goes... I just still make stupid decisions once in a while. But I'm generally doing well. I'm still writing down everything I eat so I can look back at it later and feel guilty or happy about my decisions.

Well, I'd better head off to bed here shortly, I do have water aerobics and work tomorrow. Luckily, I'm almost finished packing for the Louisiana trip! Less than 4 days now!!

*The title of this entry was brought to you buy a song title from my favorite band, Superchunk. I just thought it would be fitting here!

Day 30- Who are you

I'm Milissa. I'm 28. I make mistakes just like everyone else and I don't believe that I'm perfect or that I know everything---not even close. I play softball, I swim, and I run. I make efforts to eat in a healthy manner but I sometimes slide on that. I've had weight problems since I was a kid, and I'm finally making efforts to turn that around. I have an unhealthy obsession with lip gloss. I love my family and my closest friends, they mean the world to me. I love geology and geography. I collect rocks and foreign currency. I have skin conditions that can often be annoying, ranging from acne to eczema to dermatitis. I once broke my ankle and I still have issues with things like jumping or stomping my feet. I once broke my nose and had surgery to correct the deviated septum. I've had shingles, and I have nerve damage from it. I hate peas. I can't eat fresh pineapple, but I love the way it tastes (read: nerve damage). I've seen Gone With the Wind so many times that I've lost count, each time was with my Grandmother in my childhood and until she passed away. I love a good pizza, and have been known to make special trips to get some, even if it means driving for 2 1/2 hours one way (Klondike's in Arroyo Grande?). Breakfast is my favorite kind of food, though. I can be stubborn and level headed at the same time, but more than likely stubborn. I've been playing the piano since I was 9 years old, self taught. I want to learn how to play the steel drums, really bad. I don't make wishes on shooting stars, on fallen eyelashes, or when the clock reads 11:11, but I do smile when the clock reads 12:34. I'm a little bit double jointed in my hands. I wear glasses that are breaking, and I haven't had an eye exam in about 7 years... I'm due, but I can't afford it. I love traveling, and if I could afford it, I would love to go more often. I need to get a new car- either a Honda Fit, a Chevy Aveo, or a Ford Focus. Because I work so far away from home and geography/geology is one of my main loves in life, it'd be nice to have a more fuel efficient car than I have right now. I have two people I consider my BFFs, Barb and Steph. They are similar and different in so many ways. I have a problem with Bath & Body Works. Every time I go I spend way too much money. So I have a ban on going to Bath & Body Works until I've used ALL soaps and lotions I've already bought there. It will be a while! I had braces twice. I work in child care at a group home, and it's the most fulfilling job I've ever had. The idea of wearing contacts creeps me out, but I remember sitting on the teeter-totter with my friend Tesla in kindergarten, touching my eyeball to gross out other kids. The order of best desserts goes: Cake, frozen yogurt, apple pie, ice cream, cream pies, then cheesecake. Brownies are up there with cake. I'm half Portuguese, quarter Italian, and the rest is a mixture of German, English, Scottish, and Irish- in the order of most to least. I identify most with my Portuguese and Italian heritage. I've taken 5 "foreign" languages in school: Spanish, French, American Sign Language, German, and Portuguese. I wear size 11 W - 11 1/2 WW in women's shoes, that equals size 9 1/2 - 10 in men's shoes. When I get nervous, I pick at my hangnails and scabs. I think cream cheese and triscuits are the perfect snack- especially reduced sodium

Monday, August 9, 2010

Day 29- In this past month, what have you learned

You know, I'm always learning new things, even if it's something minor. Lately I've learned that if I set my mind to something, I can achieve it, as long as it's within reason. I mean, I'm never going to be an astronaut or a screen writer of my own popular sitcom (the second of which actually is a dream of mine).

I'm also learning my limitations, as well. Especially when it comes to my finances and where I'm spending my money. I'm making less trips to the grocery store, and I'm buying less crazy things I'll never use. I bought a package of barley and various other whole grains a while back, and I never really use them... That's an excellent example of some stupid spending on my behalf.

I think those are two of the major things I've learned about myself though.

5 Days

I have five days until I leave my comfort zone of weather for epic amounts of humidity and near constant thunderstorms. The temperature will be in the low to mid 90s the whole time I'm there, but the humidity will be over 60% most of the time I'm there, too. I've never experienced that kind of humidity.

I talked to my friend Kayla yesterday for a few hours, and Kayla grew up in Louisiana. I got a lot of great pointers from her, and I'm going to try to pack as best as I can for this weather change. No make up (or very limited, and probably just waterproof mascara), and light clothes (not bulky- I would have packed light anyway, but I'm going to think about every item I pack instead of just sticking it in the suitcase)!

I'm ready to pack already, and I will be about 90% packed by Wednesday evening because I work the following 3 days before I head to the airport on Saturday!

Just 5 days to go!! I'm really excited! I can't wait for my face to melt off and fall on the floor!

Or as Kayla said, "You will step off the plane, and humidity will hit you in the face with an aluminum baseball bat." I've also been told I might hack/gag/wheeze the instant I breathe in the humidity. Oh yay! Something to look forward to! LOL

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Day 28- A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?

About a year apart, or so...

One was before I broke my ankle, one after. One I was probably about 240, the one after about 260. I've been dealing with on-again-off-again depression and my weight is what suffers. I went through a boyfriend somewhere in there, too, for 3 months. Kind of a waste of time, but I definitely learned my lesson (of not knowing someone well before starting to date exclusively). Me a year ago was in love with roller derby and everything that it entailed, and that was how I broke my ankle. Only a matter of a month ago (or less!) I had enough of the girls on the team turn catty toward me, so I severed ties with not only the team, but most of the girls on the team (not including people that I knew before I was even involved with roller derby...and there were a handful of others I kept around because they are EPICALLY AWESOME regardless!). Now I'd rather not have anything to do with roller derby. Instead, I got back into my original love, softball. So that's one major thing that has changed- bye bye derby hello softball!

Other than that... Nothing else major has changed. I've been trying to up my morale by updating journals/blogs/diaries more often, and taking more vitamins and trying to eat properly and get plenty of exercise (210 minutes a week, minimum!). So that's changed, too!

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Day 27- Why are you doing this 30 day challenge

Because I fail at keeping this blog I've been trying to make myself blog more. A lot of these daily entries have been written a day or two in advance and scheduled to post... So I'm cheating a little bit... But I've been visiting this blog every day to ensure that the entry has been posted and that there aren't any massive typos. It's forcing me into a habit of visiting this blog often, so hopefully that will translate into updating it more often. I'm hoping for 2-3 times a week after this is all finished!

Louisiana Bound in 7...6...5...

I'm leaving Fresno for Louisiana in a week, but I'm only going to be gone for a few days. I plan to totally abuse my digital camera while I'm gone. I'm making mental plans to go to any and all plantations I can find while I'm there, and see what life is like in Creole Country.

I'm looking forward to hanging out with my friend Eric, but even more so looking forward to spending time in my first Southern state!

Friday, August 6, 2010

Day 26- What you think about your friends

I'm just going to list off those who I consider the closest of all of my friends, and what I think about them, I guess.

Barbara - You've been there for me through a lot of crazy crap in the NINE years that I've known you. I can't believe that our friendship is reaching a decade old, ha ha. You always know what to say and you always give sound advice based on your life experiences. You're my number one cheerleader when it comes to me trying to better my health, and it means a lot to have someone constantly in your corner, hoping nothing but the best for you at all times.

Stephanie - MY PEA POD! Our friendship is pretty magical, wouldn't you agree? It's the kind of friendship where you finish each others sentences, and can sense something is wrong when we don't even say it. You've been a great support for me at all times, and I thank you so much for that! I love how we can find humor in the craziest of things... "ffftt ffftt ffftt," ring any bells? lol!

Tomica - I like how we can talk about any topic at complete random, and I love how great of a listener you are. I love how I can call or text you at the drop of a hat to hang out. I like how we both have these perfectly quirky personalities that mesh well together.

Susan and Kim - I'm putting you guys together because most of the time that I spend time with either of you, the other is there! I love and adore you both. You know, like I've said to Susan before, had someone told me that of all of the people that I met through Kim Schuller, that I would feel the closest to you guys than just about anyone else (though Tomica is right up there, too!), I probably would have been like "Nahhh, you serious? Really?" I feel so at ease when I'm hanging out with you guys. Laughing comes so easily. You guys have helped me better understand who I am, just by being you. You've shined a lot of light on semi-recent events that have happened in my life, and for that I am SUPER thankful! <3

Stacey - Yet another person that has always been there to support me, no matter what the crazy topic I'm freaking out about may be! You always offer some of the best advice, ever. You are extremely wise. You are very bold and you don't let anyone screw around with you. You also have a gigantic heart, even if you don't often show it. We've never hung out much, but I've always felt like that wasn't a dire necessity for our friendship to be in place. Though I wish I could afford to make it up to Sacramento a bit more often, because I'd totally chill whenever! (I'm still upset that my last plans to try and come see you were put off, but it totally wasn't your fault!! <3)

Elijah - You are probably the closest male friend I've ever had in my life time, and you live all the way on the other side of the country. You have a great sense of humor, your Southern Charm is absolutely amazing, and any lady would be so very lucky to have you---too bad I'm a bit protective and think no one will ever be good enough. ha ha!!

Eric - You make me laugh harder than anyone I've ever known, and it could just be as simple as sending me a picture of something completely random on my phone while you're at work. I think you're absolutely goofy, and that's why I think you're so awesome. :)

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Day 25- What I would find in your bag

On an average day, the contents of my purse look something like this:

My wallet, iPod (if I'm not listening to it), my keys (if I'm not using them or they aren't in my pocket), my cell phone (again if I'm not using it or it's not in my pocket), lip gloss (often several tubes, I'm a lip-gloss-aholic), tylenol and ibuprofen, a hair clip or hair tie, sunglasses, headphones, and gum.

Sometimes there will be stray change floating around in the bottom, or some receipts that didn't make it into my wallet. But that's pretty much it!


I interrupt this 30 Day challenge to tell you that in the last week I have lost 6.4 pounds, going by the scale at my gym. I am extremely proud of myself in attempting to make a lifestyle change, not just a "diet."

-I've been writing down every thing I eat, even if it's something I should be embarrassed about, so later I can assess the damage and ask myself what I could have done better during that particular day, moment, or time.
-I've been aiming for 210 minutes a week of physical activity, which levels out to 30 minutes a day. If I can't find 30 minutes a day to exercise, I feel extremely guilty now. However, since I've instated this 210 goal, I've beat it every week. This week I'm somewhere around 380 minutes, and on Tuesday I had already passed my weekly goal.

When I watch shows like The Biggest Loser and Losing it With Jillian Michaels (which I hear has been canceled) it helps keep me motivated. I created one of my two main mantras based on Jillian Michaels. I just say "What Would Jillian Do?" If she would scream at me to push through a hurdle on the treadmill for another minute, I'm going to do it. If she wouldn't eat garbage, I try not to eat garbage.

Yes, I'm making a real effort this time. Especially after I realized that I was having fun exercising and eating right... And I still managed to lose 6.4 pounds!

By the way, in case you were wondering about my other mantra, it's "No more excuses!"

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Day 24- A letter to your parents

Dear Mom and Dad,

I know I've given you guys plenty of crap throughout the years, but I really do appreciate everything that you do for me. Even if I don't say it enough, I love you both very much. You've always been there to help me in any way that you can, even if it's just through moral guidance or by letting me still live at home at the age of 28 so I can finish my education.

Thank you very much for all you do!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Day 23- Something you crave for a lot

These... I can't explain it. But they are SO YUMMY!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else

There are many little things that probably make me a little unique from the average person, or just the average person my age...or just the average girl. I'm just going to list off random things that break the "norm."

-I don't really like clothes shopping.
-I hate shoes, especially since I broke my ankle! You try and find shoes that fit 11 W - 11 1/2 WW feet that don't look hideous!
-I don't much care for make up. When I'm at the gym, sometimes I'll see girls with it PLASTERED on. Sometimes I'll even see commercials for that mineral make up that supposedly covers EVERYTHING. Women on the commercials are always whining about hating their freckles, or whatever else... I like my freckles. The only thing I don't like is pimples. If I'm going somewhere nice or I just want to look a little "prettier," I will sometimes dab on a little cover up and then blend it in... And I often will put on a little mascara with MAYBE some eyeshadow... But I'm typically au natural. I like being natural. ...I do however, enjoy putting my hair in curlers from time to time. lol
-In that same vein, I appreciate my birthmarks, flat brown moles (like dark freckles), and scars. I don't have any desire to cover any of that up... But I would appreciate it madly if my stretch marks would disappear. lol
-I play video games. Not nearly as much as I used to, but I still enjoy them. I tend to stick to Nintendo games because they seem to be the least complicated... If you put an Xbox controller in my hands, I just stare at you blankly for a few minutes.
-I love science and math. It's apparently not that common for girls to love those aspects of education. I've actually been known to solve math problems for fun, because I'm that much of a dork.
-I collect rocks and foreign currency. Every time I go on a trip, I tend to bring a rock home with me. I've yet to bring one home from Arizona, though. I'm waiting to go to The Grand Canyon, The Painted Desert, or just go wandering around in the Desert sometime when I'm there... THEN I'll bring a rock home from Arizona.
-I would much rather have a few friends that I hold close, than to have a lot of people I sort of know. This is why I trimmed down my friends list on Facebook from 640-something to 240-something. I often sit and think about who else I could delete if I wanted to. hehe
-I twiddle my thumbs sometimes, when I'm bored, a habit I picked up from my grandpa...but even more so when I'm bored...? I braid my hair or pick at my hangnails.
-I have nerve damage from a case of Shingles when I was 21. It's gotten a little better, but it will more than likely be a life long condition. And in case you didn't know, you can get Shingles multiple times... So I'm potentially doomed as far as that goes!
-I hate "romance" movies. I will never watch The Notebook or Nights in Rodanthe, or 90% of Amanda Seyfried's movies... Or anything else with Rachel McAddams in it... Blah! I actually tend to prefer a good romantic comedy or just flat out comedy over just about anything else. But sometimes action and drama can be pretty awesome.
-I hate poetry. I am often amused with limericks though, and will sometimes make them up at random.
-When I was a kid, I wanted to be a writer. In fact, from about the age of 6 or so until just a few years into college, I still played with the idea of becoming a screenwriter for television. I write awesome dialogue, and I have great ideas...but I suck at all of the meaningless details (think: Tolkein). I still wouldn't mind writing someday, but I know that I need a good solid foundation for a career before I really even think about spending time writing scripts again.

How's that? :)

Sunday, August 1, 2010