Saturday, July 31, 2010

Day 20- Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

Oh sheesh, who knows. All I'm going to say at this point is characteristics that I would love to have in a future spouse or long term relationship, and characteristics I would not like.

I've always found determination, goal setting, and focus to be some of the most attractive things in a person. It's great to think that people aren't just floating around existing with no real expectations in their life. Being a bit of a dreamer is also ideal, but not too much. I would still like him to be grounded. However it's awesome to say things like "I would love to one day travel the world, I dream of it often." As for determination, here's a good example. I once dated a guy that was driving down from San Jose to see me for the first time. He got lost, went the wrong way on the freeway, and went over an hour out of his way, one way. Well, even though that relationship didn't end up anywhere, it spoke volumes that he was still willing to get on the right path and come over to see me anyway. That's about 5 1/2 hours of driving.

I'm not saying that he needs to have the exact same sense of humor as me, but it helps to be able to relate to a person's sense of humor. If I had a nickle for every time someone on Facebook got offended at something I said because they took it out of context (re: me making a joke, not making an insult), I'd be a millionaire... Okay no really, I'd have about a buck thirty-five...ish. But when I say a sense of humor, I don't just mean being able to crack jokes and make me laugh. I adore a guy that can make me laugh easily, but I also admire a guy that can laugh at himself, too. Not taking yourself too seriously, and laughing when you trip and fall instead of getting mad about it. I'm a klutz, and through the years I've gone from getting pissed when I tripped, to now laughing at myself like "Oh geez, here I go again!"

Family and friend oriented is a big deal for me, too. I just think of the movie I Love You, Man, in which Paul Rudd's character has no friends. It seems odd to not have a friend, at all. I love my family, and I love my close friends, and I wouldn't give them up for anything. However I do want to say that I get frustrated of the "bros before hoes" types of friends. I totally don't mind the bro-code or the fact that some guys think they definitely should come first before another guy's girlfriend... But I hate guys that refer to girls as hoes, or as if they are to drop everything they are doing for their friends, all the time. I guess though, one of the main reasons that I like for a guy to have his own family and friends beyond me and my family and friends, is because we all need to retreat somewhere. We need someone to talk to that isn't our significant others. Someone who will offer advice or just listen to all you have to say. If a guy I were with in the long haul didn't have any of that, it would put a strain on our relationship, because they would have no where to vent to if I did something completely stupid/crazy, like us women are known for doing. lol

Intelligence is such a turn on. If I can have a conversation with a guy about just about any topic under the sun, and they carry on their part, I'm like putty in his hands. Things that bother me sometimes about this though, is that sometimes when a discussion can turn into an argument/debate, and sometimes, some guys, when they are losing their side of the argument, instead of trying to keep going in a friendly manner, start lashing out insults. This is a big peeve of mine. San Jose dude mentioned above used to do this to me! ...Anyhow, this also is related to being quick witted. I love a guy that can think on his feet. :)

It would be ideal to have all of these traits, the only thing I'm not epically picky over is appearance. Though I must say that I've always had a leaning toward... Lanky, skinny, pasty, white boys, with longer dark hair (not long, medium length, I guess, a couple of inches?)...

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